I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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