i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
