Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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