i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize