he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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