I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
