But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Randomize
