i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
