i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
