this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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