And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
