I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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