I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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