pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
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