Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
