He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
