Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Why can't burritos get me drunk
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
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