Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
A+ Viking dick
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
