Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
