Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Every concussion has its silver lining
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
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