So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
