I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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