So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
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