that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
