My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
