quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
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