He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
