ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
