I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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