do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Randomize