just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
