I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize