the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
