are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
Come see our sink grown plant.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
