How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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