Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
thus making me awesome and them whores
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
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Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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