So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Randomize
