OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
someone get that fucking seahorse.
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
