We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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