i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Randomize