take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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