Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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