i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
being pregnant is like rehab
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
