it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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