Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
