I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Randomize
