Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Randomize