Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
