Plan B is the new Plan A
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
