Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
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